Only If You Said Goodbye: Handling Loss at Thanksgiving

I wished you would have said goodbye. But if you did I'm sure I would not have let you go. I wonder now what you thought of in the last moments that you held life in your grasp. Did you think about me/us? The picture on the wall lay flat on the floor face down as I entered my living room, I wondered how it happened, the backing gave way, as did you. You gave up what you could no longer hold; life. I miss you. I wish we had those long talks in the night. I wish we would have held each-other until the morning. I wanted to hear you say, "I love you" my daughter, you are special to me. Just one more day to make it right, to clear the air, to tell you that I wouldn't trade you for anything in this world. You are the only Mom, and Dad I have and I cherish you both. But you both left so soon without warning. I miss you so.

I miss you so, why did you leave so soon. I/ we needed you. Why weren't you able to give yourself and not things. All I/we have left of you are the things. They're void of life , the chairs you sat on are empty. 

This Thanksgiving I will remember when we all ate together, and tired of Turkey everything by the next Wednesday after thanksgiving. No more Turkey left overs please. I'd eat more dried turkey by Saturday if only you had said goodbye. I might not have let you go in Peace. I wouldn't, couldn't endure such an responsibility, so the Infinite lover of my soul spared me the moment of your final exit.

IF you or someone you know is suffering the loss of a loved one this thanksgiving holiday; Give Thanks for the life that they did have, for the moments when you did hear them laugh, or cry > Give Thanks that they were yours for even one moment in time and they loved you the best way they knew how. Even if they never said it, think of the times when they showed up for you.  It takes a strong will to accept the loss of a loved one and even more courage and tenacity to let them go and rest. I know you cry yourself to sleep at night, but take courage and give thanks. Give thanks this thanksgiving that you have those memories and the opportunity to create different ones now.  

Thanksgiving is an opportunity to reflect on all the goodness you have in your life, so don't allow sadness and loss to consume the joy and the opportunity you still have to give thanks. Love and move forward even if your loved ones never said goodbye. They loved you more than they could say.

The Incubator

You are your own personal incubator of success. Those ideas you freely share with others, is a virtue you may continue to cultivate; which, can serve as somewhat of a mental catalyst to your own success.
We live in an Era of massive information, and; access to it is not scarce nor is the information necessarily new for that matter. Even the wisest man that ever lived said, "There is nothing new under the sun." So sharing information can be a catalyst for someone or yourself to keep
motivated whereby creating a path to success.

Most people never realize their full potential, because; for one reason or the other they become stagnated by circumstances, fear, and failure. The average human being is mostly afraid they won't succeed. So they become their own personal incubator of ideas, innovation, and success that never moves outside of themselves.
In order to move past this crippling bad habit is to open the incubator of the mind and allow those ideas to become practical works of evidence. If you want to have a photography business, which captures the memories of countless individuals. Then you must first buy a good camera , and begin taking pictures of close friends and relatives, and of your neighborhood. Maybe you can take a photography class that teaches you the processes of good imagery/photography. This may be the vehicle to your first photography job.
Incubating ideas in the mind is good but putting them to practice is even better.

DREAMS CRY

Tears fill your eyes as you imagine all hope is gone. Your dreams will never see the light of day. " Or so you think" Why are you inhibited? What is holding you back? Who told you that you can't do it? Or maybe your circumstances suggested that you shouldn't!! It's time to stop living within the prescribed ideas that others have for your life. You must decide now!! Not tomorrow! You may have been dreaming of writing that book for a long time, and somehow one thing or the other gets in the way, right? Quit making excuses, start writing living today, and then tomorrow you do it again, each day until it's done. Or maybe you've had a business idea for a much longer time but you can't seem to find the way.  
Voices of discouragement are reeling through your mind like an ancient locomotive that's moving the speed of 200km/h of the fastest train in the world? To a greater extent your destiny is calling you. The speed of your doubts should be overshadowed by the sound of your feet on the pavement of life; with an urgency that defies gravity itself. Consider how the Cherry Blossom makes it green leaves; as the season changes, despite of the changes in weather conditions; it does what it does because it's season has come. At night the beautiful white flowers appear, but in a few days it turns to tiny budding green leaves. Before you know it summer is here, and another block of time slips away. Our Dreams cry inside us when they suffer from expressive malnutrition. Give them new life. Are your dreams crying inside you? Will you move only when your season changes? You decide how long your dreams will cry.

The Plastic New Year and You.

So it's a new year and everyone's excited about the prospects of a new beginning, changes, relocation and brand new opportunities. It is very realistic to think that a new year or season should bring about positive changes in your life; especially,  when you felt like you've been in a rut for a while.
What is it about a new year that makes people feel that magically, circumstances will change in their life? Is there any truth to this ideology? Well according to Psychology Today, in "Prime Your Gray Cells".  The answer to our question is Plasticity.
Simply put the brain has the ability to change our perspective , If we train it to do so. For instance the article states that with plasticity of the brain, "your brain has the ability to grow new neurons, make new connections, and tamp down dysfunctional or unproductive connections."
So often times we're stuck in a rut because that is what we are thinking.We do not exercise the brain in order to get it to respond appropriately. In other words, We are what we think.

So if you think that your circumstances will not change then the brain sends the signals throughout the body and that becomes our experience. Hmm. So; so much for the new year and new beginnings huh? NOT!! Absolutely the opposite.
The New year is associated with people's beliefs that as a new year rolls in something new is on the horizon. In actuality something new is happening everyday of our lives we just don't elasticize our brains  to thinks so. We don't have to wait for a new year to think that a season of sadness, disappointment and or difficulty will suddenly go away, because it's the new year, it would go away anytime you deem it to, or believe that it would go away.

Now for a lighter note: what does the new year do for us? Well it puts the brain in gear to make changes that we could not or would not otherwise do any other time of the year. We create this thing called RESOLUTIONS!!! Ahhhhhhhhh....according to Websters the definition of  resolution is; the mental state or quality of being resolved or resolute; firmness of purpose.or it's a resolve or determination: to make a firm resolution to do something. So the plasticity of the brain has been visualizing change, and newness right? 

Alright then; consider this, if the brain has the ability to be plastic or moveable, or changeable; then the strength to accomplish goals, challenges,  and circumstances is to tap into those ever growing neurons, which connects the mind to our plans.  It brings about FOCUS; which is what most of us need in order to take on a challenge or change our purpose, direction or circumstances, the plastic brain connects us to our true goals and desires..

So what is this saying? In order to be resolute there must have been a decision to make a change or do something from some earlier date, right? And we just didn't act upon it or do something to bring about the change. So now that the season has change we make the connection that something new needs to happen. We begin to stretch the elasticity of our brain; or rather the PLASTIC of our brain. So now you understand that the new year is somewhat of a catalytic machine for the Plastic Brain in You. What ever you do, know that your plastic brain supports you.

Survivng Your Post Graduation Jobless Blues

Are you amongst the millions of US college graduates still clamoring for a job in this crazy job market? It seems all your efforts for a job is fruitless?  You may feel frustrated, let-down, and sometimes down-right mad. Have no fear; there is hope!!. Ruminating about the obvious will only increase your anxieties. So you must take steps to normalize the problem by looking outside your personal cubicle; only to see that you are not alone in  your quest. 

Joblessness can lead to hopelessness and even depression. According to a report from the National Alliance of Mental Illness which stated that,  "The World Health Organization has warned that the global crisis will likely cause increased mental health problems and suicides as people cope with poverty and unemployment " (October, 2008).

So how do you see yourself surviving this crisis? Often our expectations in life precedes the reality of our current circumstances. We must make an assessment of the availability of our expectations and make adjustments to suit. Have you considered finding a job that does not require a college degree?   Understandably; after all the time in school and all the money expended, you just can't phantom not working in your field or even finding a job in it's equivalent. But have you?

For many college graduates this may do a job on your self esteem and even your self worth; but do not allow the prospect of a lower paying job to fool you into thinking that, that's where you will stay forever, and you become paralyzed and do nothing but stare at the walls. Although you may not find a job in your area of study you can always find a job that just pays the bills in the meantime. Taking a job beneath your post graduation expectations can be difficult; but,  "You have to change your thinking in order to change your outlook/outcome."  

   

Accepting a regular job pays the bills for many other Americans without college degrees, so settling in and finding one won't hurt.  "It would be a benefit to you in the long-run." Many employers hire their next employees from a pool of already working people (Sounds Crazy, but it's True) In other words... Working Anywhere Could Lead to Your Next job Offer. Adjusting your thinking and focusing on what's before you; Soon enough you will reach the top, but you may have to start low.  Why, even the Eagle flies low before soaring/reaching to great heights. A  lesson in humility may be too large a pill to swallow , "You think" but believe me you may need to go into survival mode, and not allow failure to determine your future.

You may even consider going back to school, and get an advanced degree, like a Masters, or Doctorate. Sometimes college graduates can earn income through work study; Research Assistant-ships, Scholarships and Fellowships. (From personal experience, after seven months of job hunting to no avail; I choose to pursue an advanced degree. I made use of Fellowships, Graduate Research Assistant-ships, and Scholarships. There are days when I have highs and lows, but all-in-all I found a way to keep the lights on. I never quit, I still job hunt everyday, and maintain a positive attitude and I smile, even laugh as much as possible.

If you are already at the top of your educational goals, take heart, there is a place for everyone. Taking a cooking class,computer class, or volunteering at the local nursing home or hospital (Just Pouring Fresh Water for a patient can change your perspective and will eliminate stagnation.) It may mean the difference between Pride and Perseverance. Sometimes you have to use your skills to create a job for yourself and some other desperate souls. Even starting a small home based business from a personal interest or hobby may lead to income in your pocket. Finally, do it the old fashioned way; check your local Sunday papers for leads on job openings or even the local TV station websites post job openings. Enter contest for scholarships and grant offerings, by writing essays, poems and articles even research proposals can bring that needed extra income.  

Hey don't give up!! Persistence is Key

 "Winners Never Quit; and Quitters Never Win." . Vince Lombardi.

 See ya next Post. Kathy.

Developing Entreprenuerial Kids

Teaching your kids to be entrepreneurs may be one of those values that will foster healthy mental development in them for a lifetime. Parents who encourage their kids to start a small business will teach kids the importance of decision making, balance and self control. Small business knowledge creates independence in children and can take control of all their boredom issues. When children learn to think independently, it develops creativity in them. Many children today who are diagnosed with attention deficit disorders and some other forms of mental illnesses such as depression; may simply be suffering from a lack of a challenge in their lives.

  

Teach Them to Turn Their Interest into Enterprise

Kids today are mostly interested in video games, music videos, sports and text messaging. My son at eight years old wanted a droid. Of course you know what my answer was. However, their interest is constantly changing and kids are always looking for new things to get into. One way to get them interested in doing a small business is to encourage them to value your money. Don't just automatically buy things for them when they want it. Encourage them to make, or sell something in order to get the money they need. 

Understand The Value of  Their Dollar

One thing I learned is that kids don't like to spend their own money, my son in particular would run to put his money away in his Star Account,and then ask me to purchase something for him with my own money. One way that I discourage that is letting him know that, whatever I spend is coming out of his own money. So that usually teaches him the value of saving his own money, because the need for the item he wanted suddenly changes to, "Nah, I don't really want that item anymore, I can do without it!!"

Encourage Their Own Ideas Not Yours

Encourage them when they have an idea whether it is in selling cookies, lemonade, or even in having a garage sale. My son always wants to sell things from our house; unfortunately, our neighborhood does not allow garage sale or yard sales. I must say that I have been a slacker, because I should have already found another way for him to sell those items from our garage. It is not too late, so I will have to figure out what to do to get those items sold and put him in-charge of the pricing and selling.

Don't Micro-Manage Them too Much

Don't be afraid to let them fail, failure is a good teacher of determination. When we allow them to mess up they learn something valuable for the next venture idea they have. Give them the tools by asking them how they plan to get their business working, and then help them steer them in the right direction, but let them do it for themselves as much as possible.

Take Them Through the Process of Entrepreneurship

It's never too early to Teach Kids the benefits of doing a business plan and getting a license; or the difference between selling from the garage or operating  from a store front. Kids need to know that their is a right way to start a business, even though their venture may only be a fun activity for them in the beginning. It would be good for them to learn now; which, will make it easier for them when they grow older, and decide they need to start a business. This may be some of the best education your kids could learn from you, when you teach them to fish, rather than give them a fish!!

The Value of a Social Enterprise

 

Exploring the avenue's of non-profits versus for-profit organizations is a worthy exercise that may help you determine your purpose for seeking Independent Business Ownership. With today's economy people are seeking ways to provide services that benefit others as well as provide some level of financial security for themselves and their families. However when potential business owners can develop solutions that create better livability for others in their communities, then their level of true leadership has begun to show it's strengths. It really takes a leader with finesse, determination, and focus to start a non-profit/social enterprise instead of a for-profit organization. 

Although emerging markets for non-profits have recently been increasing it takes a very strong leader to take on a non-profit as a career path. Harvard Business School has stated that. "Nonprofit organizations require strong, innovative leadership, especially during uncertain times"  why? Because the supportive services and capital for emerging markets are far and wide in our current economical state. The percentage of private and federal funding for non-profits organizations are far less than those of the for -profit businesses.

The resources available to non-for-profit organization must come from a place of  passion. For instance; the need to restore an economically challenged area in a city, and developing programs to meet the needs of that city in terms of jobs, educational programs, and or solving housing issues; requires a substantial amount of financial support and a leader with gusto, to get these type programs up and running. The funds for these type projects may come from a private entity, governmental agency, an individual or Philanthropist. According to the "Urban Institute" data indicates the amount of financial contribution non-profit organizations have filtered into the economy. The data also indicates the following data for the revenue received by non-profits in 2006 (see the following ).

• In 2006, nonprofits contributed $666.1 billion to the US economy.
• In 2006, nonprofits received $1 trillion in revenue, a 5.7 percent increase over 2005.
• In 2005, 12.9 million people worked for nonprofits, up from 11.1 million in 1998.
• In 2006, wages and salaries totaled $489.4 billion, compared with $318.9 billion in 1998 (not adjusted for inflation).

According to Harvard, "More than 700,000 nonprofits operated in the United States in 2009. Ninety percent of them had annual budgets of less than $500,000, and 99% spent less than $10 million on their constituents. The average grant size for large foundations was only $50,000. 

Fortunately, the US government has many supportive services to provide assistance for non-profit or social enterprises; therefore, with this information and statistics in mind the value of starting a Social Enterprise/ non-profit organization may well be the route to follow if you have  a passion to bring people together and make a change in communities, where you live or even around the world. Go with Gusto and you will succeed.